...i had the weekend from hell. I'll be brief about it but i got hammered on friday with my brothers and their friends. well i called mark for a ride because i was too drunk to drive, he made a big deal...had my brother fight with him for me while i hid. huge argument, mark left. I was single for about 12 hours but too drunk to realize this really was so. Anyway, i came home around 5 in the morning. we fought, then we passed out, then we spent the rest of the day fighting while i packed my shit. I didn't wanna go. Yeah, he does things that piss me off and sometimes it feels he's a little controlling. I've been patient, i realize that he's never been in another relationship and doesn't know what hes doing. I know it's only because he loves me and is so afraid of losing me...but still. and then i get drunk and suddenly i have the balls so say what i've been feeling and i make everything worse.
Anyway, i somehow got him to stop making me pack my bags under a few conditions. He told me to stop drinking. generally this would piss me off but i've had a feeling for a long time that i have a drinking problem. I never know when to stop. I do stupid things. i embarass myself, i forget conversations i've had and whats the point to get so fucking wrecked like that? I'm afraid though, because alcohol has always been my way to open up and actually be myself...and thats another reason to stop. I don't know if i can be any fun without booze but i can try.
Other than that, the rest isn't important. Except for the fact that he compared me to my aunt and that he is convinced i sucked one of my brothers friends off...but it goes without saying how that made me feel...
Anyway, to cheer myself up i went shopping alone today. I bought two pairs of shorts at hot topic, generally i wouldnt shop there, its expensive. It's so fake. Like i mean, c'mon their motto used to be, "It's all about the music" and there is now no music shit in that store except for maybe a couple my chemical romance cds, but who listens to that garbage? Anyway, one pair was sublime, the other pair i'm ecstatic about. They have pikachu on the front and in big letters across the ass it say pokemon. yeah, i'm a nerd but i'm damn proud of it.
I got a few tops at sears, one is pink zebra stipes...i'm so happy the animal prints are now in style because i love it. As for the rest of my day I've been spending it in bed with toots, techno music and vicoprofen, for my back which is fucked up AGAIN.
Oh and i would have posted pictures but i have no idea how to on this website? will someone tell me how?