the good, the bad...

yesterday I met with the chiropractor at the physical therapy place. He's not overly friendly, the way my previous chiropractor was (because he was trying to make a sale), yet helpful, and professional. He took my history and examined me and I explained what the quack had told me (3 times a week for a year, degeneration,etc.) he says to me, "Look, i'm going to tell you right off the bat, none of that is necessary. And if I had to see you three times a week for that long of a period of time, I would change my therapy plan because obviously it's not working." I like him already, right off the bat, he agreed to fill out my paperwork for FMLA, and i'm realllly hoping I can get them to throw out the previous guys statement and close this whole stress, and workers comp investigation. I'm not working because im in pain, not because the place stresses me out. Besides, it's not just work that's causing stress in my life, take finances for example. He applied to electodes to stimulate my back along with heat, then he started this thing called the gaston technique. he puts this cream on my back and scrapes a dull metal tool across my back, to chip away some of the bad stuff and promote healing. He told me some people say it feels really good, some say they barely feel it, some say its excruciating, unfortunaly im one of the people who says it's excruciating. He didn't even have to adjust me, but once I left his office, I already felt and improvement and  was even able to go to bed without taking a vicodin. That's how a chiropractor is supposed to feel? no way...although it didn't last, I woke up in a little bit of pain, I was able to sleep last night and at least for a few hours feel somewhat better.

After his appointment I went and saw my primary care doctor, who can be kind of a dick. he feels my back once, and does the reflexes in my knees and says, "I don't know why your in pain, you shouldn't be in pain." Well fucktard, I don't know why im in pain either, I just want it to go away and get my life back. he starts going on and on about stress (great, another thing for FMLA not to approve my claim) and says that these PT people aren't going to be able to help me and throws some Cymbalta samples at me. He's refusing to refill my vicodin prescription, but he gave me an anti-inflammatory instead. I'm hoping this won't be an issue, i'm hoping in seeing these new people I can get this whole thing under control because really that's what I want before I start launching into this whole scale brigade of psychiatrists and therapists and prescription drugs. It just pisses me off, I dumped my psych doc maybe a month or two ago and managed to (by myself) taper off the Xanax. I really just don't want to have to depend on those meds again, and the Cymbalta (the one anti-depressant that doesn't totally fuck up my life) has no generic and costs fucking thirty bucks a month for me, money I do not have. I also don't have forty bucks to spend on a psych visit, although I know once I get through this back pain, maybe that will all be for the best.

I went and saw my new chiropractor this morning, again the stimulation, heat, graston tool and he did a slight adjustment, much different then what my other chiropractor would do. My other chiropractor would crack me to the point where it would make this very loud sound, to make it sound like he had done something great, only to feel no relief after. This guy, barely any loud audible cracks, but a definite decent feeling after. I start PT on Monday and I have a follow up with him after, i'm hoping it goes well and by taking the initiative to strengthen my back, this problem will start to get fixed.

I just can't help it though, I know stress bad...push it away, but I really cant help but think about it. How this guy totally screwed me over, how my doctor can just completely not care, how Unum may not approve my short term disability and I'll have to go back to work and suffer. I want to write a bad review about that chiropractor, because somehow there aren't any online about him (that's why I went to him, I thought I was making a good decision), I want to warn people. I just don't want to get sued...but maybe a letter to his office may be a good route. he also gave me his home phone number...so I may feel inclined to pass that around to a few choice drunk people from time to time...hehehe...